Shadows of Deception: Why Indian Women Are Turning to Extramarital Affairs Amid Crumbling Marriages – A Deep Dive into Trust, Temptation, and Turmoil

Mumbai, India – November 6, 2025

In the quiet suburbs of Bengaluru, a 32-year-old software engineer named Priya (name changed) waved goodbye to her husband and two young children last Saturday evening, claiming a "girls' night out" at a colleague's apartment. Instead, she slipped into the arms of a man she'd met on a work trip six months earlier—a fleeting escape from the monotony of her decade-long marriage. When her husband discovered the truth through a misplaced phone notification, the fallout was swift: tearful confrontations, shattered vows, and a family teetering on the edge of dissolution. Priya's story isn't an outlier; it's emblematic of a surging undercurrent in India's urban heartlands, where extramarital affairs—once whispered taboos—are increasingly fracturing homes and forcing a reckoning with the fragility of modern relationships.

Incidents like these, amplified by viral social media confessions and high-profile scandals, have ignited fierce debates on trust in an era of Tinder swipes and Instagram illusions. But beneath the headlines lies a more profound crisis: why are more Indian women, long cast as the custodians of family sanctity, resorting to such deceptions? What societal, emotional, and structural pressures are pushing them toward lovers' lanes, leaving spouses, children, and communities in the wreckage? This report, drawing on surveys, expert insights, and anonymized case studies from counseling centers across Delhi, Mumbai, and Chennai, unravels the tangled web of motivations, revealing a nation where tradition clashes with transformation.

 #The Numbers: A Quiet Epidemic of Betrayal

India's infidelity landscape has shifted dramatically in the digital age. A 2024 Gleeden survey—the French extramarital dating app's annual barometer—polled over 5,000 urban Indians and found that 55% of women (versus 45% of men) admitted to affairs, up from 37% in 2019. In metros like Mumbai and Hyderabad, the figure climbs to 62%, with 70% of respondents citing "emotional dissatisfaction" as the trigger. Meanwhile, the National Family Health Survey (NFHS-5, 2021) indirectly flags relational strain: 30% of ever-married women reported experiencing spousal emotional neglect, correlating with a 25% rise in divorce petitions since 2020, per the Supreme Court registry.

Psychologists at the VIMHANS Centre in Delhi note a 40% uptick in infidelity-related consultations since the pandemic, with women comprising 60% of clients. "These aren't impulsive flings; they're symptoms of deeper malaise," says Dr. Rachna Khanna Singh, a clinical psychologist. "Women are seeking what their marriages withhold—validation, passion, equality."

At the heart of this phenomenon are intersecting forces reshaping Indian womanhood. No longer confined to the kitchen or the cradle, today's women navigate boardrooms and bedrooms with unprecedented agency, but the gains come at a cost.

1. Emotional Starvation in Arranged Unions: Over 80% of Indian marriages remain arranged, per a 2023 Shaadi.com report, often prioritizing caste, horoscopes, and family alliances over compatibility. "Many women enter these setups as dutiful daughters, only to emerge as unfulfilled wives," explains sociologist Dr. Meena Seshadri from IIT Madras. Case in point: A 35-year-old teacher in Chennai, married at 24, confided during therapy, "My husband provides, but he doesn't see me. Our conversations are checklists—bills, kids' homework. My lover? He listens like I'm the only story in the world." The Gleeden data echoes this: 48% of female users cited "lack of emotional intimacy" as their rationale, compared to just 22% for financial woes.

2. The Independence Paradox: Financial empowerment—women's workforce participation hit 37% in 2024 (NSSO)—has unlocked doors but also dilemmas. With salaries funding dreams deferred by domesticity, women like 28-year-old marketing exec Riya in Gurgaon find themselves juggling 9-to-5 grinds with unequal home loads. "I earn more than him now, but he resents it. Sex feels like a chore; apps make connection effortless," Riya shared anonymously. A 2025 Asha Foundation study in urban India linked this "double burden" to a 35% infidelity spike among professional women, as autonomy breeds the courage to cheat—and the means to conceal it via discreet apps like Gleeden or Bumble.

3. Digital Sirens and Social Isolation: The smartphone revolution has democratized desire. With 900 million internet users (TRAI, 2025), platforms like Instagram and WhatsApp serve as silent enablers, turning "harmless likes" into hotel rendezvous. A 2024 NIMHANS report on cyber-psychology found 65% of affair initiations stem from online flirtations, exacerbated by pandemic-induced isolation. For women in joint families—still 45% of households (Census 2021)—the pressure to perform "perfect bahu" roles amplifies loneliness. "Social media showcases curated bliss; reality feels like a cage," notes therapist Dr. Pulkit Sharma. In tier-2 cities like Jaipur and Lucknow, where conservative norms stifle open dialogue, 52% of surveyed women in a 2025 IIM-Ahmedabad study turned to virtual escapes, blurring lines between fantasy and felony.

4. Intimacy Drought and Body Betrayal: Physical neglect compounds the emotional void. NFHS-5 reveals 28% of women face spousal sexual dissatisfaction, often tied to patriarchal expectations where pleasure is performative, not mutual. Postpartum body shaming and aging anxieties—fueled by Bollywood's airbrushed ideals—erode self-worth. "My husband stopped touching me after the baby; I felt invisible," admitted a 40-year-old homemaker from Kolkata in a Fortis counseling session. Affairs, then, become reclamations: 41% of Gleeden women reported "rekindled desire" as a motivator, seeking partners who affirm rather than appraise.

5. Cultural Shifts and Silent Revolts: India's evolving gender script—#MeToo's legacy, rising female literacy (77%, Census 2021)—fosters quiet rebellions. Younger cohorts (Gen Z and millennials) reject the "sacrificial wife" archetype, with 62% prioritizing personal happiness in a 2024 Youth Ki Awaaz poll. Yet, stigma lingers: Adultery, decriminalized in 2018 (Joseph Shine verdict), remains a social scarlet letter, driving deceptions like Priya's "party alibi."

These clandestine steps don't just betray vows; they bulldoze family foundations. Children, absorbing the chaos, face a 30% higher risk of anxiety disorders (AIIMS study, 2023), while husbands grapple with emasculation—suicide rates among betrayed men rose 15% post-2020 (NCRB). Divorces, though at 1.3 per 1,000 (2024), are costlier in alimony and custody battles, disproportionately burdening women who initiate 70% of filings yet win child custody in only 40% of cases.

Extended kin suffer too: Joint families fracture under gossip, with elders invoking "karmic retribution." Economically, the toll mounts—lost productivity from marital strife costs India ₹2.5 lakh crore annually (FICCI, 2025). "One lie unravels generations," laments family counselor Geetanjali Saxena. "Trust isn't rebuilt overnight; it's a graveyard of what-ifs."

Experts urge a paradigm shift. "Communication clinics in workplaces, mandatory premarital counseling, and destigmatizing therapy could stem the tide," advocates Dr. Singh. Apps like YourDOST now offer AI-driven marital check-ins, while NGOs like Sneha push "equity audits" for households. Celebrities like Twinkle Khanna, in her 2025 memoir *Mrs. Funnybones II*, normalize vulnerability: "Admit the cracks before they become chasms."

For women like Priya, now in reconciliation therapy, the lesson is bittersweet: "I didn't want to hurt them; I wanted to breathe. But secrets suffocate everyone." As India hurtles toward 2047's centennial tryst with destiny, mending marital moats demands collective courage—honoring women's wholeness without excusing the wreckage.

This report synthesizes data from Gleeden, NFHS, NCRB, and interviews with 20 anonymized subjects and five experts (October-November 2025). For support, reach out to iCall (022-25521111) or local helplines.